Stories of Us

That’s the Kind of Girl I am…

Hi. I’m Rebecca. Or Bec…also fine.

I am 28, single and live on the beautiful South Coast of NSW, Australia. I am also a mum to my wild flower, Maya Rose.

The last 12 months have chewed me up and spat me out anew. To go from a happy relationship that I had put in the ‘forever’ box to being a single mum living back in my family home is a soul-rattler to say the least…

But I wouldn’t change a damn thing.

Let’s start by summing me up in a nutshell if I may : I am the girl who never gets the brass ring. The one the guy dates before he meets the love of his life. The kind-of-ok-at-a-number-of-things-but-not-great-at-anything-in-particular type. The hopeless believer. The unlucky in love. The occasionally messy, occasionally tidy. The inherently flawed, but kind. The tamed wild-child.

In all actuality, I am exceedingly, painfully and extraordinarily average.

So when someone told me I was the one, I took them at their word. I was ready to stop searching and settle in to a settled life of being ‘the one’…a little too ready many would say. But I was determined to be the exception to the rule..to have my whirlwind love affair turn in to my forever. But as I ALWAYS F*$#ING DO…I gave everything away too quickly.

So much so, that I overlooked a myriad of signs that our love was not the forever kind.

And wound up right back where I started.

BUT

In among the heartache, the fights, the tears, the ever-looming feelings of worthlessness, I found my purpose and the forever love I so longed for: My beautiful baby girl.

Somewhere in the midst of living out a few of my greatest fears, learning to mum and nursing a broken heart, I found a strength I never knew I had. My heart is fuller than I have ever felt and I have learned more about myself than I thought I would in a lifetime. …And I am still learning every. single. day.

Sometimes through a harsh slap of reality, sometimes through tears driving home from drop-off at daddy’s listening to Ed Sheeran, sometimes by the trials and tribulations of trying to date as a single mum, sometimes through a cheeky little smile or a giggle just when I need to hear it most, sometimes through a day spent playing in our PJs, sometimes through successfully taste-testing a new puree…either way, I know what it means to love truly and unconditionally now and will never again settle for anything less.

Because that is the kind of girl I am.

So here are some little snippets of Maya and I, learning how to life!

I hope in some way, hearing our journey normalizes, comforts or inspires your own…and remember Sole-Mamma, it may get incredibly lonely at times, but you are NEVER EVER alone

B x

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s