Stories of Us

A New Years Letter to My Daughter…

My darling Daughter,

Welcome to another wondrous year. Another year of growing, learning, loving & experiencing everything life has to offer.

It is my greatest wish, from one girl to another and even more so, from a mother to her little daughter, that I can impart some things I have come to know in my life and perhaps they may help you in some small way…this year and maybe just into the years to come too.

I love this life my darling, I do. It is a wild ride of dizzying highs and devastating lows. It is not always easy, fun or happy…although it should be more often than not. Just remember, this too shall pass and a little time will heal most things. In the interim, just remember that pain is where growth happens.

I love people, my darling I do. But sometimes, even those you adore most will let you down. Go easy on them and don’t hold a grudge too long. Be angry, be sad for sure, but try to walk a mile in their shoes, you never know the threads of their very own soles that may just be fraying. And don’t ever forget the person you are: be kind, always…especially if they don’t deserve it.

I love love my darling, but it is a shape shifter. It changes daily, flow with it, try not to fight for the same you have always known over something different. But beware, if you have to question if it is an act of love, it probably isn’t. Take care of your little heart, but give it at will. After all, the mark you leave on other’s hearts, is, one day,  all that will remain.

Anger is natural, but try not to let it consume you. Being angry at someone is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die. Be angry for a little while, absolutely… then let it go. The only person you are ultimately hurting is yourself.

Forgiveness is admirable my love, but it does not mean you will always forget. It is commonplace to confuse forgiveness with forgetting…but you need not forget by forgiving. Use what you remember to learn quietly and carefully, but beware it’s use as a sword you drive through someone again and again…for that in itself is not forgiveness at all.

Tell the truth. Please. Trust me when I tell you, lies will eat you alive. You will spend forever chasing your tail trying to keep up with your own mess when it all could have been avoided by being a human, making a mistake and owning it. Very rarely is the truth unforgivable, intact it is endearing. Own your mistakes, they will compose so much of who you are and how gracious you are in accepting their reality.

Keep your promises…or at the very least, try your best to. It is ok to fail, but it is not so much to give away your word regularly without action. Keeping your word builds trust…and trust is the very foundation for almost everything.

Be unabshedly you my love…everybody else is taken and to fit in is beige and easy. Take the hard road, stick to the guns you’re built on and speak up for yourself. Don’t be walked over, suppressed or taken advantage of. Know when to talk away…for your own sake. Please.

Love your family. Even though we are a little different, we are home. And please don’t ever forget that your father and I love you endlessly and we will be here to pick you up every time you fall and you will always be the sunshine that sustains us both, even though we are miles apart in every. possible. way.

I love you, from the moment I met you, I never have and never will love anything like the love I have for you.

Mummy x

 

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